Labyrinth of Lexical Landmines

*Trigger warning: Icky words to follow.*

Word aversion! That peculiar phenomenon where certain words send shivers down our spines or make our skin crawl. It’s like discovering an unexpected ingredient in your favorite dish—you didn’t expect it, but here you are, trying not to gag.

Let us embark on a journey through the labyrinth of lexical landmines, where we navigate the treacherous terrain of words that make us go “eww.” Now, before you conjure images of us quaking in fear at the sight of commonplace words, let us assure you, it’s not quite as dramatic. But oh, the hilarity that ensues when one of us stumbles upon a word that sends the other into fits of laughter!

Consider a serene writing session interrupted by the innocuous occurrence of a word that triggers an involuntary cringe. Suddenly, our cozy writing nook illuminated by the glow of our laptops, fingers dancing across the keys, transforms into a battlefield of banter and jest as we valiantly attempt to avoid linguistic pitfalls in navigating a minefield of misplaced modifiers. (However, if you haven’t already noticed, we love alliteration.)

Take, for instance, the seemingly innocuous word “moist.” Ah, the stuff of linguistic nightmares! With its connotations ranging from freshly baked cake to other less savory associations, “moist” has become the famous poster child for word aversion. So, how do we sidestep them?

In addition to an ever-expanding “words to banish” list, we’ve developed a system of linguistic semaphore, a non-verbal dance of raised eyebrows, subtle head shakes, or not-so-subtle elbow jabs to indicate when one of us is jumping off of the perilous “precipice” or crossing the “threshold”  into “moist” territory. It’s like a synchronized swimming routine with words instead of water and a distinct lack of swimwear.

Of course, word aversion is a fickle beast, lurking in the shadows of seemingly innocuous vocabulary like a grammatical gremlin. Who knew that a simple word like “panties” could elicit such visceral reactions? Not something to twist, indeed.

Fear not, for we are armed and ready to tackle any linguistic obstacle that dares to cross our path. So, the next time you find yourself recoiling at the mention of a particular word, remember: you’re not alone in your lexical aversion. Embrace the absurdity and let the laughter flow instead. Yes, go ahead and laugh at us. It’s what we intended. No, really.

And with that, we’ll leave you trying to suppress your shivers as we embark on our next writing escapade, armed with our trusted thesaurus, dictionaries, and a dash of humor.

Feel free to share your thoughts or horrors in the comments below. We promise not to laugh at you, only with you.